Tuesday, July 5, 2016 / 5 Comments

Songs To Help You With Every Stage of Your Breakup




I was inspired to write this post because somewhat recently (around six months ago, but still) I went through a breakup. No matter who breaks up with who, a breakup is still rough, awful, and heartbreaking. And as I was playing my iTunes library on shuffle the other day, one of my favorite depressing, sob inducing breakup songs started to play. That got me thinking that maybe I should share my favorite breakup songs, from my incredibly random and varied iTunes library, to share with anyone who may be going through an emotional breakup.

Music is a wonderful outlet for people to express their feelings and emotions, and songs about heartbreak have to be some of the most raw and moving pieces of music. All of these particular songs have helped me through some tough times (and some I'm saving for future relationship woes. Boy, am I looking forward to that!). Whether they're silly bubble gum pop (my inner emo kid is groaning about what a sell out I am!) or classic rock, they have all guided me through the many stages of a breakup and have aided in my recovery. When you're going through a breakup, it may feel like your whole world has collapsed around you, no matter how many people remind you. But sometimes, a simple song may play and it convinces you that yes, there is light after the dark. It can give you the hope and desire to move on. Because after the storm of a breakup, the world looks so much more shiny, bright, and full of possibilities and bright afterwards. You're still here, despite what you thought, and you're stronger than ever. If anything, a breakup is a lesson in personal empowerment!

I hope if you're going through sometimes that these songs will help you and if you're not going through something, maybe it'll introduce you to some new songs and artists (if you didn't like Bob Dylan before you may like him after giving him a listen!). From my weird music library to yours, here is my ultimate breakup music list.

The CW
Stage 1

Songs for when your heart hurts because it has LITERALLY broken into a million pieces and you can't get out of bed because you have decided to stay there the rest of your life, but you're going to buy stock in Kleenex since you've already gone through 3 boxes what with all the sobbing/nose blowing that you've been doing:

"I Dreamed a Dream"- Les Miserables (Bonus points for the movie version with Anne Hathaway singing/sobbing some of the lines)

"Someone Like You"- Adele (The ultimate "I need to sob all the feelings out"song)

"Goodbye My Lover"- James Blunt (So cheesy, yet so tear inducing)

"Wait"- M83 (Everytime I hear this song, my eyes start welling up because it reminds me of the last 10 minutes of The Fault In Our Stars. Oh geez, here come the waterworks)

"Stay With Me"- Sam Smith (Even though it's about a one night stand after a break up, you can really feel the emotions ringing through Sam's silky smooth voice)

"The Heart Wants What It Wants"- Selena Gomez (Just forget that it's about Justin Bieber and realize it's a super good/sad song)

"Alive With the Glory of Love"- Say Anything (The story of a young couple in a concentration camp during WWII has never been so romantic and tragic)

"Need You Now"- Lady Antebellum (This song will always remind me of a breakup I went through years ago. Thanks, Lady Antebellum for providing the soundtrack to my heart break)

"Somewhere Only We Know"- Keane (It may not necessarily be a sad song, but it certainly sounds like one!)

"That Harold Song"- Kesha ("I would give it all to not be sleeping alone...")

"Nicest Thing"- Kate Nash (This song perfectly encapsulates what you wish your ex was feeling when you miss them because it's exactly what you're thinking about THEM: "I wish that I was the last thing on your mind before you went to sleep.")

Stage 2

Songs for when you're still lying in bed heartbroken, but you're remembering all the good times, and what could have been, so at this point you just gotta sob it out to some sad ballads and wonder why it all went wrong and with each thought you start crying so hard your chest hurts:

"I Will Always Love You"- Whitney Houston (You can't NOT have a break up and not listen to this)

"Everytime"- Britney Spears (When it swells to the chorus, your broken heart swells too, and then even more tears flow. It's okay, just cry it out!)

"On My Own"- Les Miserables (Lea Salonga's versions kill it no matter what recording you listen to!)

"Foolish Games"- Jewel (Jewel's poetry describes your life perfectly, whether it's going well or very, very badly)

"Habits (Stay High)- Tove Lo (A song for when you want to do anything but think about your ex- no matter how destructive it is)

"Back to December"- Taylor Swift (No matter what you think of her, you have to admit that Taylor is the queen of break up songs. All of her songs about love lost are perfection!)

"Drunk"- Ed Sheeran (When you just want to get drunk and forget. Ed Sheeran understands your pain)

"Cornerstone"- Arctic Monkeys (In case you didn't know, the Arctic Monkeys are my favorite band and this is one of my very favorite songs of theirs. It's heartbreaking, but with a nice cheeky ending that's just so Arctic Monkeys)

"Over"- Lindsay Lohan (Remember when Lindsay Lohan had a music "career"? Thank goodness she did or else we wouldn't have this gem!)

"Dark Paradise"- Lana Del Rey (Lana Del Rey, queen of sultry songs and very depressing ones)

"Jigsaw"- Lady Sovereign (For when you're feeling like your heart and life is a jigsaw puzzle that you just can't put the pieces back together)

"Need Ur Luv"- Charli XCX ("I need your love...I want it even when it hurts me":(  )

"Last Goodbye"- Kesha (She's back at it again with another ballad about saying goodbye to a forming paramour)

"Never Forget You"- Zara Larsson & MNEK (You'll want to forget your ex eventually, but right now this song just reminds you of how much you want to remember them right now)

Stage 3

Songs for when you've used up all of the Kleenex in the house and have moved on to toilet paper, and the indignity of it reminds you of the not so great aspects of the relationship:

"Everything I'm Not"- The Veronicas (When you realize you were losing yourself to somebody else...and that's not okay)

"We Get On"- Kate Nash (Your friends are right about him, even if you didn't believe them at first)

"Dear John"- Taylor Swift (Taylor, back at it again with a song ripping an ex a new one!)

"Let Me Out"- The Veronicas (You know that the relationship is going to end, but it's so hard to actually break it off: "I don't exist until you release me.")

"Fall"- Something Corporate (When you initiate the breakup and you're feeling confused, guilty, and hurt)

"Do Me a Favour"- Arctic Monkeys (Your go-to song for when you just want your ex to go away and stop trying to talk to you. You're making it worse, buddy. Just stop)

"Silver Lining"- Rilo Kiley (Despite the hurt you're feeling, you're figuring out that you're going to be okay by yourself. You don't have to be his silver lining, you can be your gold)

"Who Knew"- Pink (You just have to say goodbye, even though it's something you couldn't imagine you'd ever do)

"Someone Else"- Miley Cyrus (When they turned into a completely different person towards the end of the relationship and now you just don't recognize them anymore)

"Kill"- Jimmyeatworld (Regret, and then letting go)

Stage 4

Songs for when you're out of bed (because you were getting toilet paper to blow your nose with) and now that you're up and out of your ice cream coma, you're angry instead of sad (which is is excellent progress) and you need to get your pent up anger out by dancing, so put down that spoon and rock out to these gems:

"Smile"- Lily Allen (Revenge has never been so sweet or made you smile so much)

"Cold"- The Veronicas (Bitter? Nah, just telling you how I feel, jerk)

"Forever & Always"- Taylor Swift (Preach it, Taylor!)

"Hello Heartache"- Avril Lavigne (Embracing the heartbreak with open arms)

"So What"- Pink (Feeling yourself after the breakup, but still feeling the hurt, just a teeny, tiny bit? [Not that you'd admit it to anyone] If so, this song is for you)

"Cake"- Melanie Martinez ("You're filling up my senses with empty calories." Ouch, rush him to the burn unit!)

"Behind These Hazel Eyes"- Kelly Clarkson (For when you're feeling hurt and angry, but damn it, you're not going to let them see you cry!)

"Before He Cheats"- Carrie Underwood (This is a good one where you want to exact revenge on your ex, but don't necessarily want to commit a felony. Just live vicariously through Carrie Underwood)

"It's Alright, It's OK"- Ashley Tisdale (When you want to comfort him with the fact that you're so much better without him. Sorry not sorry)

"Love is Dead"- Kerli (For when the darkness has taken over your heart and you start thinking that you're never going to bother dating again. The feeling will pass, but right now it feels so good to just say goodbye to love forever)

"Positively 4th Street"- Bob Dylan ("You got a lot of nerve to say you are my friend." Even if you're not a folk rock fan, Bob Dylan is one of those artists that can express himself in the most beautiful, lyrical way, even if he's totally dissing someone else in a song)

Stage 5

Songs for when you're finally up for going out with your friends and after spilling all of the emotional and gritty details about the breakup and relationship, and you're in your safe circle of friendship so you're ready to forget boys for the night because GIRL POWER:

"Telephone (feat. Beyonce)"- Lady Gaga (For a night out with friends and your ex won't stop texting...smh)

"Irresistable"- Beyonce (To remind you to never let him make you feel guilty for you dumping him!)

"Break Your Heart Right Back"- Ariana Grande feat. Childish Gambino (Another fun revenge song)

"Ex's and Oh's"- Elle King (For when you've embraced the single life and the trail of broken hearts YOU'VE left behind)

"Rolling in the Deep"- Adele (Belt it out with everything you've got!)

"Problem"- Ariana Grande feat. Iggy Izalea (You have one less problem without him now. Phew!)

"No Broken Hearts"- Bebe Rexha ft. Nicki Minaj (For when you need to dance it out with your friends and forget your troubles)

"Doing It"- Charli XCX feat. Rita Ora (An ode to friendship and all the times crazy times you've shared. Best friends forever!)

Stage 6

Songs for when you realize that after days, months, however long it takes for you, that maybe the relationship wasn't right, and it's okay that it didn't work out and you're on to bigger and better things (or bigger and better guys. Hey-oh! I went there). You're at that sweet acceptance stage where yes, you may carry a little scar on your heart from that heartbreak, but it's a reminder of what you want in a relationship, a partner, and love. They may not have been just right for you but guess who is perfect for you: YOU! And until another guy comes along, you are perfectly happy being your flawless, fabulous self. Work that beautiful self and live your life to the fullest (but really, screw that guy!):

"Alive"- Sia (You're still here, and you're better than ever)

"Part of Me"- Katy Perry (For reminding yourself that no one can take away what makes who you are. You'll always have that ♥ )

"Fight Song"- Rachel Platten (It doesn't have to apply to a breakup. It can be about taking your life back from any low point. Just keeping fighting!)

"Really Don't Care"- Demi Lovato (For when he thinks you're still upset about the breakup. Um, no!)

"I Don't Need A Man"- Pussycat Dolls (When you're totally feeling yourself and your newly discovered singlehood)

"Hair"- Little Mix (An ode to the power of a new haircut/hair color/hairstyle. something almost every girl does after a major breakup)

And of course...

"Since U Been Gone"- Kelly Clarkson (This may be the ultimate F you song. It literally says "I am doing just fine without you, thank you very much". Plus, the video is literally iconic!)

Keep your chins up, fellow weirdos, and remember that no matter what, you don't need another person or relationship to define you! You're enough for you and anyone else who comes in your life romantically is just an added bonus! :)

via GIPHY

-That Weird Girl Emily

[Disclaimer: To be fair, I use toilet paper as Kleenex all the time. I don't feel like it's an indignity to use TP in lieu of Kleenex, I just thought for the sake of the piece it'd be funny to say. But there is something about using the last piece of Kleenex and being left with an empty box while your eyes are leaking tears and your nose is running like a faucet. Sometimes desperate times call for desperate measures. Sometimes you use some of your dirty laundry to wipe your nose. Hey, it's going in the wash anyway! Don't judge me!]
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5 comments:

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  2. Great post. I have to admit my guilty pleasure is blasting some tove lo and taylor swift!! But I am glad to see JimmyEatWorld, a local AZ band, made the cut and a song I was unfamiliar with. Thanks!! Also, Positively 4th Street is one of my favorites by bob dylan aka mr. zimmerman. Probably one of my most influential writers and musicians that inspired me to play.

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    1. So glad you liked the list! "Kill" is one of my favorite Jimmyeatworld songs. And I'm so happy someone appreciates Positively 4th Street as much as me! :)

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    2. I never had the chance to see them live, you ever? I saw Bob Dylan at the end of his career and it was a great time to be able to say I saw him play live, the songs that influence my music and writings. There is a great documentary with Dylan talking about his old and his latest songs and how it was magic that wrote his songs and how he doesn't think he could ever write like that again. Very interesting.

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  3. I never did see Bob Dylan live, but I've seen a few of his documentaries! I have seen Jimmyeatworld live, but that was years ago though they put on a GREAT show! Lucky you that you got to see the legendary Dylan!

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