Saturday, April 9, 2016 / No comments

A Much Delayed Update (Over a Year!)




Me oh my, how time does fly! I can't believe it's been over a YEAR since I last updated this blog. But that's not to say that things haven't happened or that I haven't checked a thing or two off of my bucket/adventure/life list.

I'll start off by coming clean: I wasn't sure for a while if I was going to continue with this blog. I still wanted to travel and have adventures but I wasn't sure if keeping this blog was a good idea. Life was getting crazy and moving forward so quickly, that keeping up with the blog seemed too daunting.

Around the time that I last updated my blog (over a year ago! Geez! I still can't get over that), I was in a new relationship. I've been in relationships before, but this was my first serious one. To make a very long story short, we moved in together, moved OUT of the first apartment due to a roach problem (I think I now have some sort of post traumatic disorder because whenever I see a bug, I automatically think DANGER DANGER ROACH ALERT, even if it's just a fly), moved into a new place, and in December we broke up. I moved back in with my parents (as any self-respecting, newly single 27 year old person does) and here I am.

I'm not here to paint a sob story about my last relationship or my ex for that matter, but in short: he was a great guy but it didn't work out, it wasn't right, and in my opinion, it moved way too fast. There are so many things, good and bad, that were in that relationship and I'm grateful for all of those experiences.

In the beginning of the relationship, it felt like I found myself. I had finally moved out, with my very own grown up place, living with my boyfriend, finally feeling happy and confident. But as the relationship continued, I came to realize that it wasn't the right one for me and as I grew more sad and depressed in my confusion if I should stay in the relationship or end it, I lost myself. Instead of focusing on my own growth and happiness, I focused too much on the relationship, him, and trying to make it work. I've always said that it's okay to be selfish sometimes. I just didn't take that advice for myself.

A lot of soul searching later, plus endless talks with my friends and family, we broke up and I moved out (and back in with my parents. Hey mom and dad!). I'm slowly beginning to get my life back together. Was/am I being selfish? Possibly. No, definitely. But sometimes you have to be selfish. Sometimes you have to put yourself first. It may hurt the person you were with at the time, but in the long run, it's worse for you. That's what I tell people and that's what I'm finally telling myself. Being selfish in this instance isn't a bad thing. It's focusing on yourself and your own happiness and well-being. And that's exactly what I'm doing now.

Which now comes back to this blog. I neglected this blog because I was busy trying to be a good adult and save money to pay rent, bills, etc. Which is what I'm still doing now, but I'm also trying to set aside some money for my adventures and travels. Sadly having fun usually costs money but I want to experience more in life again and I think saving money for travel is a high priority to my growth as a person. That is why I am recommitting to this blog and my long disregarded bucket list.

My blog may not be updated as often as it used to be (minus this year plus dry spell!) but I'm going to promise to try to live and have lots of adventures and cross more things off of my list! I'm on the search for a new career and while that will most likely take up a lot of my time, I think achieving my goals is equally as important.

Also, there may be some slight revisions to my list. Maybe I'll cross out a few things and rewrite more achievable goals. Because right now it'd be pretty difficult to spend the night in an ice hotel (though I still totally want to!). I was initially picking extreme, grand adventurous goals but I've learned this past year that the little achievements can be just as rewarding as the grandiose ones. Even the small, little things in my past relationship I've been able to cross off of my mental bucket/adventure list. Everything is an adventure in life and shapes the way you see and experience things.

I actually like the fact that my blog is evolving. Because it shows that I'm evolving as a person. Hopefully for the better. So please, come along with me on the second version of my adventures and blog! Emily 2.0, if you will!

Thanks so much to whoever has come along on this journey with me so far ♥
-Emily

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